Wanted: Dead or Alive (1986) – Review

Running from the late 1950s to the early 1960s there was a Western television series called “Wanted Dead or Alive”  which was about a Confederate soldier turned bounty hunter in the Wild West of the 1870s starring Steve McQueen, flash forward to the late 1980s and we have a movie dealing with the descendant of that character, and having seen the film I can’t understand the point of that connection.

In the 1980s making a movie based on a television program was not all that common, Star Trek: The Motion Picture and Twilight Zone: The Movie being two examples of this but neither were all that successful, yet in those cases the films were at least based on popular programs and not a forgotten Western television series, one that wasn’t even big in reruns at the time.  Yet for some unfathomable reason the people at New World Pictures decided to make a feature film that wasn’t so much a big screen representation of that old show as it was a half-assed filmic sequel/spin-off that was only tangentially connected to the original series. Does that make sense to anyone? The film in question is Wanted: Dead or Alive, where Los Angeles-based bounty hunter and ex-CIA Nick Randall (Rutger Hauer), who is the descendant of Steve McQueen’s Josh Randall, must track down a notorious terrorist and bring him in, dead or alive.

“Sorry fella, I’ve got a date with a member of KISS.”

The plot of this movie deals with the terrorist known as Malak Al Rahim (Gene Simmons), who after bombing a Los Angeles movie theatre informs his followers of his plan to release gas from a chemical plant similar to the Bhopal disaster, which had a death toll in the thousands. This threat brings CIA agent Philmore Walker (Robert Guillaume) to Randall’s door, interrupting our hero’s breakfaster with his girlfriend Terry (Mel Harris), to beg for his help. Needless to say, Randall isn’t all that interested “Give me a break, between the CIA the FBI and the LAPD you’ve got four thousand men on the street, why would you need me?” but Walker counters with “This is a flashpoint situation, Nick, we need the best.”

“How could I possibly argue with that kind of logic?”

Things become a little complicated when a real asshat of a CIA agent named Lipton (Jerry Hardin) decides to use Randall as bait and lets Malak’s people know where to find him, so as to hopefully draw him out, needless to say things don’t go according to plan as Malak does not fall for this obvious trap, nor does Randall succumb to the minions of Malak. Now, as this is an 80s action movie the female lead has one of two options; she can either be captured and force the hero to come and rescue her or she can be killed to motivate the hero to avenge her, unfortunately for Terry, she falls into the latter category and dies along with Randall’s best friend Sergeant Danny Quintz (William Russ), which is like a bonus death for Randall to avenge.

“First, I must brood in my cool warehouse apartment.”

Stray Observations:

• At one point, Gene Simmons is disguised as a rabbi, which is almost as off-putting as seeing him dressed as a crazed hermaphrodite in Never Too Young to Die.
• Nick Randall has a laser sight on his shotgun and I have to wonder if he understands the accuracy and targeting ability of a shotgun.
• Malak Al-Rahim blows up a theatre that is showing Rambo: First Blood Part II but it is a rated “R” movie and we see a family with a nine-year-old girl entering, was this scene an indictment of bad parenting?
• The filmmakers clearly did not understand the effects of seven sticks of dynamite, in this film our heroes survive being a mere 100 feet away when such an explosion could level a house.  Anyone within 300 feet of the detonation would have suffered serious injuries or death.
• When this movie was released it was met with a fair amount of skepticism concerning its premise of Middle Eastern terrorist group attacking soft targets within the United States, wow, to go back to those good ole days.
• That CIA agents Lipton and Walker would be running an operation in and around Los Angeles is pure fiction as it is illegal for the CIA to operate on American soil, the FBI would be the ones running this kind of operation.
• Both Randall and the C.I.A. don’t seem to have much trouble beating information out of whatever terrorist they get their hands on, so I guess none of these terrorists prized their faith over their lives.

“I don’t understand it, I promised them 40 virgins in the afterlife.”

As action films go, Wanted: Dead or Alive does move along at a brisk pace with nary a dull moment or wasted scene, which helps one gloss over the overall ridiculousness of the plot. The script is surprisingly well-written, with plenty of clever one-liners and memorable moments and you can’t help but smile when Rutger Hauer says, “Fuck the bonus.” However, the film is not without its flaws as the plot is fairly predictable and formulaic, and some of the supporting characters feel underdeveloped. Additionally, some viewers may find the movie’s portrayal of Middle Eastern terrorists and the use of Islamophobic imagery to be rather problematic at best.

“Let’s ship these guys over to Cameron and Schwarzenegger.”

Overall, this is a big dumb 80s action movie that delivers the thrills and excitement that fans of the genre have come to expect and Rutger Hauer is excellent as the tough and charismatic Nick Randall as he brings a lot of energy and intensity to the role. Gene Simmons is also a standout as the villainous Malak Al Rahim and cements his reputation as an actor who can create villains that are both menacing and entertaining at the same time. If you’re a fan of classic 80s action films, Wanted: Dead or Alive is definitely worth a watch.